WANTED:

A sexy, romantic Gerard Butler look-alike who plays guitar and cooks and appreciates and likes frumpy fluffy girls who like to eat. Irish or Aussie accent a plus.

Is that so hard to find??

Dear Mr. Mower,

The community I live in is lucky enough that we have "landscapers". What that really means is, every Friday, at 7:00am, a jerk with a riding mower and his buddy with the weed wacker come looking for open bedroom windows to sit outside for thirty minutes. It's summer. We live in a part of the country that has no air conditioning. Everyone's bedroom windows are open. It's also my husbands day off today and I'm almost positive they knew that.
I am 99% sure it was intentional. After trying blocking the sound without success, I finally got up and closed the window. Immediately, they left.
I laid there for an hour and, I'm not even kidding, the MINUTE I started to slip into that sleepy stage, HE CAME BACK! It's like they have hidden cameras in my house!

Finally, after an hour and a half I managed to fall back asleep, to dream beautiful candy mountain dreams of a day when we don't live in a fascist, lawnmowering community.